Sitting in Maui-Wowi, a Hawaiian themed (men's only) smoothie shop in downtown Riyadh:
"Wait, I always get scurvy mixed up with rickets. Which one is rickets?"
"Rickets is the one that poor kids who work in coal mines get because they don't spend enough time in the sun. Scurvy is the one that pirates get because they only drink grog and not enough citrus."
"Right. So, then what's shingles?"
The waiter eavesdropping nearby our table turned away, bored, and went back to watching the Women's Field Hockey game on TV.
"Shingles is like chicken-pox, but way worse. Hey did you know that when you say you're groggy in the morning it comes from pirates being hung-over from drinking too much grog the night before."