Saturday, July 9, 2011

Open Letter.

To the young couple passionately making out against a BMW:


I see that you've decided to grope each other while leaning up against a BMW parked in my neighborhood. Is this your vehicle? Are you aware that the parking meter rates in this part of town are outrageous?

I've also noticed that you happen to be in front of Miu Miu store, is this coincidence or were your passions inflamed by the sight of high-end luxury goods produced by a sub-brand of Prada?

Here's the thing. I certainly can appreciate young love, or even just lust. And I understand that these feelings can sometimes lead to foggy decision making; but it is currently seven in the morning on a weekday. Are you just now concluding last evenings revelries? Do you not have jobs or school to attend today?

Also, I've noticed that the gentleman's hand is up the ladies dress and his face is pressed into her chest. Once again, I'd like to mention that it is seven in the morning on a weekday and you are in front of a fancy store in a busy shopping district.

Finally, it seems that your two friends are standing three feet away from you, bored and smoking (breakfast?) cigarettes. Do you think that your actions might be a bit inconsiderate to your friends? Perhaps they would like to get an espresso or maybe even head home for sleep? Are these the owners of the car your are using as a makeshift vertical bed for your amorous embraces?

Just wanted to say hello and I hope you've had an enjoyable evening/morning.

See you around the neighborhood,


1 comment:

Mike O. said...

Welcome to Spain! I once saw an eight-year-old boy making out with his "girlfriend" on the metro, while their friends screamed in unison, "come la lengua!! come la lengua!" So what I'm saying is... it's basically part of the local landscape. Also, you should probably wear a raincoat at all times.