Steven Vanilla

Steven Vanilla is just one of those guys. The first time I met him he got stupendously drunk and proceeded to read to me from his original screenplay, "Montana Goldberg: Action Paleontologist." Later in the same night he ate a couple of pounds of lasagna while falling asleep on his laptop.

A few months later and Steven Vanilla was back in town; this time he arrived with a full beard and wearing a plaid shirt with suspenders. The lumberjack look was completed with a knit beanie and a mason jar of beer that was refilled many times throughout the night. Later in the evening he ended up dancing with friends at Remmington's, the local gay country/western bar. I wasn't there but I hear he was a big hit with the cowboys.

So when Steven Vanilla told us he was coming back up for a night but that he had important things to take care and couldn't really stay up late, I was a bit skeptical. And to his credit, there was very little drinking and only a moderate consumption of lasagna. However, I can't say I was too surprised when I found myself in the back of Steven Vanilla's car at midnight while we drove out to a Bethesda apartment complex to meet with some sort of questionable 24 hour Notary of the Public.

These are just the kind of things that happen when Steven Vanilla comes to town. He'll be back in a few weeks for a big party coming up and he said he might even bring along his friend, Leather Jacobs. I can't wait.