Surplus Defense.

The thing about the guy that works at the Army Surplus store is that you're not quite sure at first if he's actually crazy. You walk in and he has a sign on the door about the pending rapture and you think that maybe he just has a good sense of humor about working in a store filled with camouflaged everything and machetes.

But then, after wandering around the store for a bit you hear the manager have this conversation with a customer:

Customer: "What's that?"

Manager: "Oh, that's called the Sharpie Knife. It's a knife disguised as a Sharpie magic marker."

Customer, looking confused and scared: "Why would you want something like that?"

Manager, a bit upset because he is being asked such a stupid question: "Well, you'd want it if someone attacked you and you needed a knife to defend yourself. That's why."